Sunday 17th August 2008

Proverbs 12:18
Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

There is ‘more than one sermon’ in my head right now so what I am about to write might sound a bit unrehearsed. I guess that’s the nature of blogging and writing anyway though, isn’t it?

Moment of discipline, sad event, teachable moment, whatever you want to call it today. Both my kids said something that hurt and upset someone. It was the last drop, so to speak, a build up of stuff I have been unaware of. What makes it worse is that this person is lovely, generous, godly, happy, fun and generally wonderful.

As a mum I felt ashamed and embarrased. I am one for making excuses for my kids. It’s a bad habit. In fact, as a result, Elijah plays me. He knows with a smile and a cuddle he can get away with things. I’m ready to shield him when Tim is stricter than I would be. It’s wrong and unbiblical. It is only right to protect and defend you children from injustice but when they have hurt someone they are guilty.

May be Lydia and Elijah didn’t know that what they said hurt. The person they hurt left the room, for some space, and so I had the chance to talk to the kids. They were so upset when I explained and also put to them the possible consequences. The thing that struck me and was quite a reality check was the words they said they say to me. I heard myself say that I can get over it quicker because I am their mum. Though that is true, because I put up with the words; they don’t hurt me, they don’t know that those words hurt. (If you see what I mean!)

Children are commanded by God to respect and obey their parents in the Lord (Ephesians 6:1-2: “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honour your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise.) I guess one of the reasons for this command is so that they know how to treat others. I haven’t required respect from them with their words, that’s why they sinned against someone else. Wow, what a reality check!

We also talked about responsibility. Lydia is really struggling with the fact that an adult is responsible for a child’s behaviour! She said that if she was not to listen to me and cross the road by herself and as a result got run over, she would be responsible. She has got a good grasp of sin and taking responsibility for hers so it was baffling her when I said I needed to go and speak to this person and apologise. She was upset that her naughtiness got me in trouble as well.

I love the fact that God puts us in these situations. Not only did I have to teach Lydia and Elijah, I had to take some stuff on board too. My kids, however small, need to learn about sin, what effect it has on them, God and others. They need to how to love and talk lovingly about other. They need to know that they need to be forgiven to be in right relationship with God. They need to know that they need to ask God for forgiveness. They need to know that they need to forgive others who sin against them. What freedom that brings!

The ‘Lord’s prayer’ has been very important for me lately. I repeat it several times during the day! Not religiously but because I need it. The forgiveness bit especially. I need to know and experience God’s forgiveness all the time. So often lies creep into our heads, that we are not good enough or feelings of guilt. God’s forgiveness is so freeing!

Matthew 5: 5:15

"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

"This, then, is how you should pray:

" Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
And forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one.
For if you forgive others when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

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